After years of desperate searching, endless teasing from Ed Boon, and nonstop speculation, Mortal Kombat 1 has finally unveiled its most stunning and brave secret character yet: Floyd, the pink ninja.
Yes, in a game already packed with horrific gender-swapped characters, butchered female designs, and blatant corporate pandering to ESG and DEI investors, NetherRealm has somehow found a way to cram in even more diversity, this time with a literal rainbow-colored secret ninja. Because nothing says Mortal Kombat like shoehorning identity politics into every last polygon.
The discovery of Floyd has sent what little remains of the Mortal Kombat fanbase into a frenzy, not because they were hyped for a new hidden fighter, but because, in true modern NetherRealm fashion, Floyd is just a lazy mash-up of every ninja already in the game. It’s as if his entire existence was designed to tick as many diversity boxes as possible.
He borrows moves from Scorpion, Sub-Zero, and even Raiden, because why stop at just a pink ninja when you can roll out a whole goddamn LGBTQ+ Power Ranger?
How to unlock Floyd is still unclear, but notorious Mortal Kombat 1 leaker ‘thethiny’ claims he triggered the fight after completing “a bunch of Floyd challenges.” Naturally, this has sparked the usual playground rumors, like needing to score a double flawless victory in Klassic Towers, though that theory has already been debunked.
When Floyd finally appears, NetherRealm makes sure you feel it. Every palette-swapped ninja in Mortal Kombat history flashes onto the screen in beams of light before the fabulous pink warrior prances forward to teach you some humility. Because if there’s one thing Mortal Kombat 1 needed more of, it’s woke social messaging shoved down your throat.
Before the match even begins, a massive pop-up flashes across the screen: “YOU FOUND FLOYD” in glowing rainbow letters of course, zero subtlety.
Dataminers have already picked apart Floyd’s code, and surprise, surprise, he’s not even an original character. Instead of crafting something new, NetherRealm just slapped together a Frankenstein’s monster of Mortal Kombat’s existing ninjas, recycling animations, effects, and moves from across the board.
The result? A chaotic, uninspired mess of a fight that serves no real purpose, except to parade around yet another inclusive creation, all in the name of diversity brownie points disguised as a hidden combatant.
Beating Floyd supposedly unlocks a new stage, the battlefield from Mortal Kombat 1’s first announcement trailer which is a nice throwback. The funniest part? Players who’ve been randomly thrown into matches on this stage assumed it was some kind of hacker exploit. Nope, you’re not being hacked, you’re just witnessing yet another desperate attempt by NetherRealm to make Mortal Kombat 1 seem relevant while it crashes and burns financially.
But after all the hype surrounding Floyd’s discovery, what do players actually get? A fucking Kameo skin for Scorpion and Sub-Zero. That’s right, the big secret ninja, the ultimate hidden warrior, is just another corporate-mandated, identity-politics-infused rehash of existing assets.
Because why the hell would NetherRealm invest in fresh, original content when they can just slap a new coat of paint on something old and call it progress? Just like how they bastardized the classic Ketchup and Mustard duo (Cyrax and Sektor) by turning them into generic, humanized female versions, because apparently, cyborg ninjas weren’t diverse enough.
Of course, Floyd isn’t actually playable—at least not officially. But thanks to tools like MKHook, modders have managed to take him for a spin, confirming what everyone already suspected: Floyd is just another lazy, half-assed addition to a game that’s already drowning under the weight of its own corporate-mandated DEI bullshit.
Mortal Kombat 1 has become a textbook example of how not to revive a beloved franchise. From its hideous character designs that strip every female fighter of any appeal to its overpriced DLC packs that force players to shell out for gender-swapped cyborgs, the game has fumbled every opportunity to redeem itself.
And with sales numbers that can’t hold a candle to its predecessors, the writing’s on the wall. Since its launch in September 2023, the Mortal Kombat 1 reboot has only managed to scrape together 4 million copies sold, a pathetic showing compared to Mortal Kombat 11, which pushed over 15 million units despite fans trashing it.
The message is crystal clear: gamers aren’t lining up to be force-fed DEI initiatives wrapped in a half-baked fighting game.
And now, with Fruity Floyd’s arrival, Mortal Kombat 1 has given us yet another example of how its failures are entirely self-inflicted. Instead of focusing on meaningful gameplay improvements or addressing fan concerns about the roster and the eradication of the female form, NetherRealm just keeps doubling down on the same dumbass mistakes that have led to layoffs, mobile game cancellations, and a fanbase that couldn’t care less.
At this point, Mortal Kombat 1 isn’t even a fighting game, it’s a cautionary tale. A textbook example of what happens when a studio prioritizes ESG hedge fund investors over actually making a game people want to play. Because no matter how much they shove this shit down everyone’s throats, it still doesn’t sell.
